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Happy Meal, Part 2:
How to Make It Happen

Now, how do you pull this family meal off? Everyone needs to be involved. Tasks can include setting the table, planning the meal, grocery shopping, preparing the food, serving the food, and cleaning up. Even the little ones can help, even if just pushing the start button on the microwave. Everyone participating shows caring for one another. Don't expect perfection. It's the process that's important. The atmosphere needs to be calm and relaxing. Assign one person to clear clutter. Teens are great at finding organizers for a clean table. One person might want to be in charge of a centerpiece. Relaxing music, flowers, and candles can add to the celebration of time together.

Be creative in making it happen. One important element is to have at least one adult at the family meal. If dinnertime is too difficult, have a family breakfast. If kids get too hungry before everyone is home for dinner, make sure the kids have a snack at 5:00 and then dinner at 7:00 or 7:30. The meal doesn't have to be home-cooked. Get take out; Deelish is a good option for food preparation. Get together with other families. With busy schedules, you may need to say no to less important activities. Work with the schools on schedules. Again be creative. Some parents ask what to talk about during the meal. Talk about the family history or play the game "Table Topics." During the family meal is a good opportunity to talk about difficult events of the day helping the kids reframe what happened and get a better understanding of the other people involved. Raise kids' emotional intelligence by developing a feeling vocabulary. For example, tell about a time when you felt frustrated. How did your body feel? What did you do? What would you do next time?

No time to cook? Guess what, the family meal doesn't have to be at home. The family can meet at a restaurant. The process of choosing a restaurant can include a family discussion of healthy food, in addition to food preferences. Many restaurants offer a list of the nutritional values of the foods on their menus. Keeping in mind the importance of sharing the day with each other, choose a restaurant that's conducive to talking to each other. No time to go to the restaurant; how about a car picnic on the way to the basketball game? We're all so busy. Slow down. Talk and listen more. Abundance of extracurricular activities does not make a well-rounded person. Having the family meal inserts a pause in our day of rushing around. Some families enjoy a pre-meal mingling having a cocktail/mocktail and eating some fresh veggies. This mingling gives the family time to stop and reflect before the meal begins. Children can talk about rituals the parents had with their parents. Even though teens protest and complain, they still care what you think and want input from you. Yes, even when they groan and roll their eyes.

We celebrate things that are important to us, and they often include food. The family meal becomes a daily ritual leading to kids' happiness and well-being.

As you explore ways to make the Happy Meal part of your family life, please share ideas that work well for your family.

If you have any questions regarding these articles or are interested in scheduling a free phone consultation, I encourage you to contact me by phone at 650-854-4631. I look forward to speaking with you.

 

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